A picture has appeared recently, and widely, in the social media, a picture of a man wearing a purple tee shirt, on the back of which are a list of statements about dating his 20-year-old daughter. Perhaps you’ve seen it.
The list is titled, “Rules for dating my daughter.” There are four such “rules”.
1. I don’t make the rules.
2. You don’t make the rules.
3. She makes the rules.
4. Her body, her rules.
It’s signed, “Feminist Father”.
There is an element of truth in this list. And, with two daughters of my own, I understand the concern of the father for his daughter.
Understand that this list assumes that sex will be an integral part of the “date.” And in our society, that does seem to have become the norm. And I agree that a man has no right to force a woman to be intimate with him.
At the same time, the list doesn’t go far enough.
What do I mean?
God often directs our thoughts to something we will need in the future. And not just thoughts. When I was making deliveries for a living, sometimes I would say of a street, “Let’s see where this goes.” I can’t tell you how many times later on that I needed to know where that street went.
So it is with this post. I read the article about the shirt last week some time. On Sunday, at church, the speaker quoted something from Psalm 147, which is a psalm of praise to God for His dealings with the nation of Israel, v. 19. V. 20 continues the thought: He has not dealt thus with any other nation; they do not know his rules (ESV).
You see, you and I don’t make the rules. But when it comes right down to it, neither does she. The rules have already been made.
That was the gist of the argument Satan advanced in the Garden of Eden: Adam and Eve could make their own rules. They didn’t need God for that. And we see the mess they made of it.
Modern society has fully bought into that same argument. And look at the mess we’ve made of it.
We’ve dealt with this in other posts, but it bears repeating. Sex was never intended to be an end in itself. It was intended to be enjoyed in the context of what it might produce: children. And it was intended to be enjoyed [only] by a man and a woman who had come together as husband and wife. I grant that the marriages were usually arranged by the parents; but still, it was to a married couple that children were to be born and to become a family. And those marriages were certainly no worse than the revolving door marriage has become in our day. Or no “door” at all, with couples living together wanting the benefits of marriage without the responsibilities.
Children were never considered a “burden” in the Bible. They were always a blessing – and the more, the merrier. We’ve certainly gotten away from that!
The robins I wrote about last spring have long gone and they didn’t return this spring. No other robins took their place. The nest finally became loose on top of the porch light and it’s also long gone.
The thing is, their young hatched, grew and were gone in a matter of weeks. Children take years before they’re ready to leave the nest. It may be true that we learn most of what we learn in the first three or four years, but, as I’ve written elsewhere, no five-year old is ready for his or her own apartment.
It’s in the family that we’re supposed to learn the main lessons of life: sharing, obedience, getting along with others. Unfortunately, that no longer seems to be important. And look at the mess we’ve made of it.
We decided that we make the rules.